Jan 19, 2011
Thankful for Now ~
I am currently exercising a muscle that has long been atrophied. I call it my "thankful muscle", or "grateful muscle".
How much time my mind spends harking back to "the good ol' days", or trying to "come up with the perfect scenario" for my present or future life, I would be embarrassed to divulge to you.
I just know what I have to do. I have my work cut out for me.
Every day, when I open my eyes, I enter a fight for my life...and I mean REAL LIFE.
I have to grab hold of my thoughts, as they're soaring downwards, towards the negative gutter, and begin to willfully and intentionally think of things to thank God for...even things like "a boxspring & mattress to sleep on", "privacy", "food to eat", and on and on. The list really IS long for us all, especially here in these United States, where we are SOOOOOO priveleged, AND where it IS a PRIVELEGE to live.
I don't know about you, but I FIGHT for my peace each day. I don't wake up with rosey thoughts, but I can tell you that I get there, off and on, throughout the course of a day. And taking time to worship God and pray? A discipline. A PRIVELEGE, yes, but it is a spiritual EXERCISE, and the flesh doesn't like it, but once we enter in, WE get to sense the PRECIOUSNESS of where we've entered into...and that would be HIS PRESENCE.
HIS PRESENCE IS MY GOAL, EACH DAY. And, I'm not trying to be spiritual, act spiritual, or make you think I am spiritual...I am just being totally honest with you. I, of all people, am most needy, that's all. I just NEED HIS PRESENCE. I am just DESPERATE, that's all. That's it.
So, if any of you out there wake up struggling in the mornings, and begin to think you're the only one like that, take another look at this blog, for I am your struggling sister.
But, one thing IS FOR SURE, whether I struggle or not...and that is that JESUS CHRIST IS LORD, whether I feel like He is or not, whether the world says He is or not, come hail and high water...JESUS CHRIST IS LORD! And, for THAT, I am thankful.